Listen to a reading of Cameron’s story.
What happened?
Cameron scrolled on his phone as he waited in line at his favorite food place. He was able to go off campus for lunch because his parents bought him a new car for his birthday last month. He was glad he didn’t have to eat his school’s lunch before basketball practice after school. As he sat down with his ticket number and continued to wait, he decided to check his social media.
As he checked his social media accounts like Instagram and Snapchat, he lastly tapped on the Twitter application. He was fairly new to Twitter and his cousin suggested he should make an account to keep up with current events like celebrities, politics, and sports. As he scrolled, he noticed a new tweet of a video refresh at the top of his timeline.
The tweet was a video of a man talking into a microphone, which he guessed was a podcast clip, who stated that women aren’t feminine enough unless the first thing they do is clean a man’s house for him or cook his food every time he asks. He has heard similar thoughts from other men about these misogynistic ideologies towards women and always hated it. Yet, he had never seen a video of someone spewing those comments, to an audience with such seriousness.
Once he finished watching the video, he noticed the person who tweeted the video of the man captioned it with the question “thoughts?” to see other tweeters’ reactions and opinions.
“What do I think about this?” Cameron thought to himself.
Cameron has never agreed with those statements about women. His parents, especially his mom, raised him from a young age to respect women and not treat them as objects. He couldn’t fathom hearing the ignorance that didn’t align with the values and morals he was taught. He decided to quote the tweet to express his distaste towards the hatred and misogyny of what the podcaster said in the video.
He typed out his feelings on how men who agree with comments like the podcaster in the video should not have a podcast. Spreading rhetoric like this is harmful and teaches young boys that this is okay. He was satisfied with his response and pressed the tweet button. He felt good he was able to express his feelings and say how that mindset is not okay. Cameron heard the cashier call his name to pick up his order from the counter. As he retrieved his food, he continued on with his day — school, practice, and homework.
Once he took a homework break he checked Twitter. When he opened the app, he was stunned that the bell on the bottom of the screen had over 100+ notifications. He saw a massive amount of replies from random people who came across his tweet as it started to gain attention. Cameron saw a lot of backlash that was aggressive towards him. The comments called him out for being wrong about his feelings toward women and suggesting he was pandering and catering towards women for a viral moment. He also saw comments that called him offensive names that attacked his sexuality and appearance.
What did he do?
Cameron was angry and hurt that he was called names and received backlash for defending his values about women. He felt angry that people, especially other men, felt similar to the podcaster. He felt overwhelmed that the longer he kept the tweet up, the more attention he received. He didn’t know how to handle the situation and he felt defeated. He only wanted to express himself, but ended up receiving more hateful comments than the podcaster.
His older cousin Olivia was the person who recommended Cameron to download Twitter. Olivia was opinionated and would go viral for her tweets that challenged controversial opinions. Cameron decided to call Olivia about how she handled the hate comments she received from her tweets.
“Hello?” Cameron asked.
“Hey Cam! Olivia said excitedly. “What’s up?”
“I need advice and I feel like you’re the only person who will get me what’s happening to me. I don’t want to tell my mom because I don’t think she’ll understand,” he said.
“You sound upset. What happened?” Olivia responded.
Cameron explained the situation to Olivia that had happened to him earlier that day. He was very close with his cousin, so he felt that he could call her about any problems he had without any hesitation.
“I’m sorry that happened Cam. You know I had my fair share of people being mean to me on Twitter. Things like this happen on Twitter daily sadly. Just don’t argue back, they just want to get a reaction from you because they know they are being mean. I can tell you what I do that helps me deal with hate comments that might help you,” Olivia reassured him.
Olivia suggested to Cameron that he block the people leaving the bad comments and keep his account private. She then suggests he should log off the app too and do something to take his mind off the situation. He followed his cousin’s advice and decided to block people leaving hate comments in response to his tweet and logged out to get his mind off of the situation.
The next morning, Cameron went outside and practiced his basketball skills. Basketball was his outlet whenever he was stressed or upset. He logged back onto Twitter two days later and the negative comments Cameron first saw had slowed down. He noticed when he scrolled down to look at the replies that there were positive comments, agreeing with his tweet. He saw a tweet from Olivia too, standing up for him and saying his feelings are valid. He knew that someone’s mindset wouldn’t change unless they wanted to change it but felt reassured that others, including his cousin, stood by him and had shared values in respecting women.
By Ashanti Mclaurin
Want to try the skills Cameron used?
Responding to Negative Online Interactions
Using Social Media with Balance
Want help now? There are free and confidential hotlines available 24/7. Call/text the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.